I was out there on Twitter with all my boyfriends and youse guys all hadta invade my territorial imperative

After all that kvetching the other day about the blasted landline, you know, call my cell phone, blah-de-blah-de-blah-de, I continue to be an absolute, total, utter phone klutz. Like yesterday, when I was walking around in the woods and I *thought* I heard this little funky ringing sound and then it went away and I forgot about it and when I got out of the woods again, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and it said, “Missed call from Sam! Voicemail message!” (Sam being Sam the Archaeologist, that is. Sam the dog could talk but I know he isn’t reaching out to me from the great beyond.)

Well, I hardly ever talk to Sam on the phone. We do quite a bit of emailing and *very* occasionally some I/M-ing but I/M is another thing I’m a klutz at. And we do face-to-face, typically over some sort of adult beverage. But phone? Usually, we employ the phone only to make plans. Or, er, cancel out of plans because of unforeseen events. But we won’t talk about that stuff. The reason I missed her call is not because I had the phone on vibrate. I had dutifully turned the phone off of vibrate when I got home from work yesterday. But I neglected to check the ringer volume and, of course, it was down at about 1 or whatever.

Then there was a couple weeks ago. I was walking along and I heard a faint little “Quack, quack, quack.” I wasn’t anywhere near the river or water of any sort so I thought that was a little weird. And then I took my phone out to take a picture or check my email or whatever and, guess what? Missed call from Lizard Breath. Okay. That would be because in a fit of absolute genius (like, what was I thinking?) I had assigned a duck ringtone to her phone number.

I’ve had similar experiences with phone calls from Mouse (crickets) and The Commander (African-sounding drums). Th GG has a nice, sci-fi ringtone that perfectly fits his personality but it’s pretty quiet even at high volume. Oh yeah, and then there was yesterday when I tried to join an on-line/phone meeting that my boss had called and couldn’t remember that I had to dial 9 to get out of the local phone network. Fortunately, he dubbed it a “senior moment” and we moved on.

Anyway, I got home yesterday and I was home *alone*. Spacified. Mouse and the GG walked downtown to eat a restaurant dinner and I called Sam back for a lovely telephonic conversation. And the dumpster was gone when I got home from work. And I got to eat some of our loverly leftovers. And drift blissfully off to sleep on the couch. And tonight, Dogmomster is here for a visit and we ate at Knight’s and we sat on the balcony but we weren’t next to the railing so nobody could oogle over the railing. And the GG erroneously made the suggestion that Mouse had no idea what a moped was and Jimi is on iTunes or whatever I dunno what else except I am dead taaaarrrrred. G’night.

One Response to “I was out there on Twitter with all my boyfriends and youse guys all hadta invade my territorial imperative”

  1. Sam Says:

    I fell blissfully asleep on the couch last night, too! Our parallel worlds continue….