Black Thumb Banana

<garden-rant>I have been asked a couple of times something like, “Wouldn’t you like to work in the garden?” Well. No. No, I wouldn’t. I would like to pay someone to do it.

This is our front yard. In the foreground we have a Mess of mixed up ground cover and grass with a narrow little bit of lawn between the Mess and the sidewalk, which I am standing on and you can’t see the lawn very well. We call the ground cover vinca or myrtle although I’m not sure if we know its proper name even after all these years. It’s quite pretty and at this time of year little purple flowers bloom (embiggen a couple times). There is a “border” between the Mess and the lawn made of round rocks we scavenged from the cFam’s old rock seawall at Hoton Lake after it was replaced by a cee-ment wall. You can’t see most of the rocks because the mess is growing over it.

There are also those tall scraggly bushes which we can’t bear to pull out because they provide bird habitat but I’ll save that sad song for some other time.

So the problem with the Mess is that grass (TONS of it) grows right smack in the middle of the ground cover. And then the ground cover tries to grow “down” into the lawn, covering the stones.

Okay. I like the *idea* of gardening but I don’t really like *doing* gardening. One of the reasons I don’t like doing gardening is because I HAVE A BLACK THUMB! Almost nothing I have ever tried to do in the area of gardening has been successful. Take the Mess. I have spent a gazillion hours trying to weed the grass out of the middle of it and about all I have ever gotten for my efforts is poison ivy. Yes, it grows back by the bushes if we don’t police it.

I am no doubt not taking the right approach (because I don’t know any better). Also we have crappy clay-ey soil although you may be able to see that plenty of things do grow in our yard. Just not necessarily things we WANT to be growing.

So. I gave up many years ago. I would LOVE to hire a nice, natural landscape/garden business to help me/us clean things up, design some new features, and then maintain them. I am stymied in this because my other half is a penny pincher when it comes to anything they believe is DIY-able. But gardening really isn’t, at least not here at the Landfill, because no one has a Green Thumb. I am NOT Warren Buffett but I can afford to pay someone to help me with my fugly yard.</garden-rant>

Orange ya glad I didn’t blahg about the help wanted situation? That may (or may not) be coming in a future entry. I am so sick of all the memes…

One Response to “Black Thumb Banana”

  1. Margaret Says:

    “Help wanted?” Have I missed something on social media? I have a lawn service that is expensive but they take care of everything except weeding and mowing. The former I reluctantly do with hatred in my heart, and the latter I enjoy. Hiring professionals to put it in some kind of order would then allow you to merely keep it up, which isn’t as overwhelming. There’s (there are?) my two cents!