Author Archive

A squeaky blahgger

Tuesday, February 19th, 2008

mouseblahg.jpgSqueak squeak! I don’t know if my owner really wants to come back from Senegal but if she doesn’t come back soon, I am gonna have to get Froggy and Smokie to fly me over there. And don’t tell Ol’ Baggy, woops, I mean Mouse’s Moom, because she will not let Froggy drive the flying machine because he keeps getting into the listerine and laundry detergent and stuff and getting drunk and passing out. And Ol’ Baggy, er Mouse’s Moom, is afraid he’ll drink and fly. And I don’t know if I want to ride with him on his flying machine when he’s drunk either. And I’ve been living in a plastic bag here! Squeeeeeeeek Squeeeeeeek! The Old Grumpy Growler is afraid I will disintegrate if I’m not in a plastic bag! Froggy and Ol’ Baggy (I mean Mouse’s Moom) think it’s okay but I don’t like it! Although I do get to wear Froggy’s babushka and a nice sarong from Bali. Grok grok! So THAT’S where my babushka went! grok grok. It’s okay, I gess th’ li’l squeek mousey c’n ware it. I love you Owner Mouse. Come home soon. Ol’ Baggy (I mean your moom) misses you too and so does Froog when he’s not sleeping it off in his londry baskit.

Squeak! Squeak! Squeak!

Wednesday, October 3rd, 2007

mouseblahgger.jpgThis is the little squeak mouse. I’m alive. I didn’t need CPR the other day. Mr. Security Froggy was just fooling around. He and Ol’ Baggy are taking really good care of me. I’m safe and I get cheese to eat and air bottles and Ol’ Baggy is taking us (me ‘n’ Froog) with her on trips and things. She doesn’t take us to the grocery store but that’s a good thing. grok grok. Whaddya mean? I like t’ go t’ th’ grockery store. grok grok

I’ve belonged to my owner since she was eight months old. The Beautiful Gay and the Uncliest Uncle gave me to her for her first Christmas. In the beginning, I was just one of a whole bunch of dolls and aminals. There were so many of us that my owner got a little overwhelmed. Then a little later when she was a walking baby, we went to visit some of her cuzzints. One of them (one of those others who are not girls) had the same mouse as me (Substitute Mouse) and, when he saw my owner with me, he got a little bit confused and grabbed me away from her!! My owner cried and Ol’ Baggy or somebody rescued me and gave me back to her. Ever since that, I was her best aminal and she even took me to college with her. She was afraid I wouldn’t survive in Africa so she left me with Ol’ Baggy ‘n’ Froggy ‘n’ all the rest.

I got lost a couple times when she was still a little girl mouse. Once I almost got left on top of a wastebasket in McDonald’s! But Ol’ Baggy ‘n’ Liz ‘n’ my owner came galumphing back in panicking about losing me and I was rescued. Another time, they thought I was lost forever. 😥 My owner even went to bed with my friend New Mouse that night. And then! Just when she was about to go to sleep, she remembered that early that morning she had stuffed me into a shiny metallic purple bag and dumped a bunch of markers in on top of my head! It’s okay. I love my owner anyway.

And she *is* a mouse. She has some nice warm mouse fur that she uses when it’s cold outside. Just ask The Commander about that! And every night when she goes to sleep, her cute little mouse ears and her long skinny mouse tail come out.

I miss my owner a whole bunch. But maybe she’ll bring a rooster or two back from Africa to join up with all the rest of us aminals. Cock-a-doodle-doo Grok grok grok