Decompressing via bad TV

When I am at the Landfill, I rarely watch any TV. In fact, I can’t even figure out how to turn on the 1970s era Sony Trinitron in the Back Room. I do know how to turn *off* the vintage Sony Trinitron in the bedroom before it starts shouting BaGawk! BaGawk! at me. Here in the Great White North? I turn the TV on as soon as I get back to the Squatter’s Paradise in the late afternoon. Why? Because inane background noise helps me decompress.

It takes two (yes, two, count ’em) remote controls to turn this blasted thing on. I do not know why it takes two remote controls but I *can* get the blasted thing on so I’m not complaining. Changing the channel? Hmmm… It’s okay though because the channel the dern thing is currently set to has some of the worst shows I have ever encountered and I am loving it!

How about beauty pageants for babies? Yes, I know that they exist (think Jonbenet Ramsey) but they are largely off my radar screen. So holy cow! I cannot believe this stuff. Makeup and spray tans (SPRAY TANS!) and a mom who started planning her daughter’s pageant career as soon as an ultrasound showed the baby’s gender.

What about what the KID wants to do? What if the KID doesn’t want to wear glittery, sparkly dresses and a fancy shellacked hairdo and ten pounds of makeup. And a SPRAY TAN!!! What if the kid wants to run and jump and throw balls around or read books and daydream or… or… or… Some of these kids are SO young that they haven’t even begun to figure out what their interests are. And what about children whose gender identity doesn’t fit neatly into the category of male or female but have been assigned one or the other at birth?

Sputter sputter sputter. And then! The next show to come on featured the lovelies in the photoooo. How would you like to be interviewed by a panel of cute little pinkies like these? What are we being interviewed for? A spot in a loverly little sorority of course. Sisterhood for life and all that rot. I cannot remember the interview questions or the exact discussion between the pinkies when deciding whether or not the interviewee was a “rush crush” or not. Catty and shallow and nasty. Who are these air-headed little strumpets and who the heck are their parents and why were they raised without a single ounce of compassion for people that aren’t like them? Blech! And yet, I was mesmerized by the whole thing. Could not take my eyes off it.

Sputter sputter sputter.

I’m watching a hoarder show now and I can’t wait until My 600 Pound Life comes on.

5 Responses to “Decompressing via bad TV”

  1. Margaret Says:

    Some of that bad TV is positively addictive. It’s like a train wreck. I got caught up in Hoarders for a while, then I couldn’t stand it anymore. (rat poop in the kitchen and the people were mentally ill) However, I can never resist Law and Order if it happens to come on, or old sitcoms. They remind me of my childhood and are comforting.

  2. jay Says:

    After a difficult day there is nothing better than “Wipeout”.
    My personnal guilty pleasure. Makes me laugh out loud.

  3. isa Says:

    I love you, mama.

  4. jane Says:

    My thoughts on your tv show selection are quite varied. 😉

    As you know, I am not a particularly religious sort of person. And as you may also remember, I am currently experiencing some sort of ‘he’s a train wreck but I can’t seem to look away’ (Newt Gingrich), as well as the rest of the republican primary ‘entertainment’. (whoa – I DO need to get a job.)

    anyway, I think that the President’s ‘speech’ at the National Prayer Meeting this morning would be the perfect anti-dote to watching whatever sorority rush show you watched yesterday. again – I am not a religious person, but most of his comments were right on – be kind to each other!

  5. Kathy Farnell Says:

    I have wondered about that Hoarder show. I hear that it gives a body real incentive to clean and de clutter (is that a word?) your home. I really should watch it.