I am an introvert and I am exhausted
Yeah, I think I am about done for tonight. We didn’t have an overwhelming number of people at our visitation but we had a steady stream and they were all *friends* but I have done more than my regular share of conversation today. I mean I am a *nerd* and mostly I talk to other *nerds* — the ones I work with, that is. We are all friendly with each other and we do talk but sometimes our conversations sort of sputter along. And yes I know that “introvert” and “blathering away about one’s life on the internet” are a bit incongruent.
Technology came to my aid. We had computers set up all over the room but the big screen thingy our fave funeral guy has absolutely mesmerized people. The GG had about a billion slides on that thing, including some really random stuff. I mean you might go from The Commander threatening me with a stick to an aerial photo of the Mackinac Bridge under construction to a bunch of blue peeps with faces attached to them. Yeah, Easter peeps. You know the ones. What do blue peeps have to do with The Commander? I do not know.
Friends. The McNotts, the huge family that shares our beach with us. They are not family but we’ve all known each other all our lives, so they almost feel like family. People I have come to know since The Commander started having problems and I have been hanging around up here. People whose faces I recognized from my childhood but couldn’t attach a name to. People I normally see only on facebook. A woman who I *saw* in a photo on facebook over the weekend — I am friends with her daughter on there. The friendly young minister at the church we haven’t attended since I was a child. The North Country Trail folks. I could go on and on…
After it was all over, we took the mean old grunchie old Grinchie out to Zorbam for souvlaki. I needed to eat. I’m not sure I needed a whole bunch of loud conversation about various military guns. But boyz will be boyz. Anyway, I am way beyond conversation at this point and I am just rambling on incoherently so I’ll quit while I’m ahead. As I told someone else to do earlier tonight. After I thought about it, I decided he wasn’t really ahead but he better quit *anyway*.
Good night. Heading back southward tomorrow, back to work and on with life…
P.S. I added some captions to the slideshow. And here’s a link to the obituary I wrote (very hastily) for The Comm.
February 27th, 2012 at 9:55 pm
When you are feeling emotionally fragile, it’s even harder to be social. You did great!! It is easier for introverts to write than it is to socialize verbally, isn’t it? When I’m feeling closed in, I love to write but would prefer to stay several hundred miles away from actual people. 😉
February 27th, 2012 at 10:58 pm
You and the GG planned so creatively for this evening’s gathering. We all were drawn to the photo slideshows of the Commander and your family. These visuals of a life well-lived are comforting during our feelings of loss. You made her proud! Sleep well and safe travels.
February 28th, 2012 at 10:05 am
Love you, KW. Loved the pictures without the captions; will check them out with when I get a better connection.
February 28th, 2012 at 2:22 pm
Bubs and I went thru the slide show last night, so it’s almost like we were there! Except I didn’t have to talk to people I don’t know from the Soo! The pics were a ton of fun – especially the really old ones. 😉 There was one in your cabin with Jack, Harry, Bubs and Fran. Harry looked at it, said ‘ok, that’s Jack, that’s Fran…’ pause. “Wait – is that your mother and me!? What year was that!”
February 29th, 2012 at 12:48 am
I so totally relate to the introvert thing. Hate talking. Well, among groups of people (one-on-one I’m fine). I felt quite a lot of relief when my mom insisted that there NOT be any type of service when she died. We honored her wishes and actually got some push-back from some people (although it was very easy to say “those were her wishes.”) I read the obituary and am struck by The Commander’s education — something that was quite rare for women of her generation. Hugs to you — a trying time, I know. Coming up on my mom’s 6th anniversary of her death, on Mother’s Day. We had a complex relationship, but boy do I miss her.
March 3rd, 2012 at 1:39 pm
As Margaret said, being introverted and writing/using the computer to communicate go hand-in-hand quite nicely. In fact, all but one person in my group of 7 is an introvert, and 4 of the 6 are INTJ (me included). We love email and Office Communicator and NetMeetings and webinars and rarely use the phone.
I do well speaking with the team, and I can even do a sit-down presentation of technology to a staff meeting of those-above-my-supervisor… but afterwards? I’m spent. This past week had me out of my office and doing day trips to 5 different cities/company sites for all but 1.5 days. Yesterday was an all-day meeting that was supposed to have something like 10 people (there was a max of 5 for a while, but 3 for the last couple of hours). By last night, I was doing everything possible to stay awake until 9PM.
Introverts get their energy sucked out of them by being around other people; Extroverts get their energy from being around others. Neither have anything to do with being truly “shy”.