It was a small task. A financial transaction and a *simple* one at that. But not one I knew how to do. After being bugged about it for two days, I agreed to learn how to do it. Under ONE condition. I get to “drive”. And there better not be any man ‘splainin’.

The GG estimated this little “lesson” would take five minutes. He likes to call these things “lessons”, which makes me absolutely see RED!!! So I got into the driver’s seat and after a few moments of total confusion, I was anticipating each of his instructions and I think the whole thing got done in maybe two minutes flat.

Or would’ve happened in two minutes except that I haven’t used a computer mouse in umpteen bazillion years. I was on the GG’s big iMac, which I never use, and I had no idea how to scroll with the mouse. I exclusively use my phone or the touchpad on one of my laptops. I couldn’t figure out how to scroll with the mouse. Disclaimer: I don’t own two laptops. One of them is from work. It is completely locked down so I couldn’t use it for anything non-work if I tried.

I am a hands on learner. If I have to watch someone demonstrate something or listen to someone take forever to explain something, I doze off after about three seconds.

Also, sometimes I think he forgets what I do for a living and how many years I’ve been using computers? We’ve owned computers since the Apple II+. I taught myself BASIC on that musheen, my first computer language. When Apple introduced its first *viable* laptop in 2003 (G4 powerbook), I saw an ad for it in the old dead tree New Yorker and ordered one pretty much immediately. The GG didn’t know I bought it until it was delivered. That’s not to mention the “dumb” terminals I used to talk to mainframes in my “childhood” job.

Gratuitous shot of an old DecWriter terminal in my childhood office’s computer room. That particular DecWriter talked to those tall boxes, which constituted what we called a “mini-computer”. They made sounds like washing musheens! Other terminals talked to mainframes in remote locations.

P.S. Hey, we’ve been married for 40 years. If we can survive MAGA vs. sanity, we can survive this kind of crapola😵‍💫

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