Trade your crocs in for a doctype or two

Lemme seeeee…

Started the day listening to a man complain about having wet cold feet. Why? Because he was wearing inadequate footwear (crocs) in a snowstorm.

Ended the day listening to a man complain about having wet cold feet. Why? Because he was wearing inadequate footwear (Keen sandals) in the aftermath of a snowstorm and stepped through some ice into a puddle.

I want the pharaohs but there are only men.

We don’t need no stinkin’ doctype! Whaddoo we need a doctype for?

The Commander HATES when I use the expression “I don’t need no stinkin’ ______” but it reminds me of The Beautiful Paula, so I’m using it anyway.

The Beautiful Paula was one of the people that used to keep me sane back in the days of the young actors guild. She was there for the whole Hot Hands and the Trailer Trash Moms thing and she was there the day I first discovered I had a wifi connection in the green room at the Lydia Mendelssohn and I will never forget her face the day some young turk yanked a great big drinking fountain off the wall over at Scarlett Middle School. Kaboom! Fortunately, it was a Scarlett kid, not a YAG kid. Oh, not that TBP used the dreaded “stinkin'” expression frequently but she was a very creative wordsmith and there was this one day we were emailing back and forth about out how to deal with the parent of a “prodigy” (you know the kind) and she said something about “we don’t need no stinkin’ headshot” and I was literally ROFLMAO. I guess I got off on a tangent there but TBP has been gone from the earth for lo these last six years and I’ve gone on to other things but I still miss her.

And why do we need a doctype? Most of y’all prob’ly do not wanna know.

It was the 1980s over at Panera today. Mouse texted me (from across our small table) to tell me that. And she was right. And she would know because she has played 80s characters in her last two plays. Me? I don’t remember much about the 80s. Little blonde children and diapers and mice and things.

And then they had to turn off the water at my work at 4:00 PM today and so from about 3:30 until then, my cube neighbor and I could hear a constant flushing of toilets. We are not very far from the bathrooms, don’tcha know. There were some relatively creative bathroom jokes and I suggested a pail for flushing and then somebody said, “I’m going to the bathroom. See you on Monday.” And we pretty much all vamoosed outta there.

Finally, a rather oaklandish Stormy Kromer attracted quite a bit of attention at whatever that outfitter on Main Street is. All the young clerks were raving about his fancy outfit and lamenting that their store didn’t sell that loverly yooper stuff. Meanwhile, a snarky old yooper woman was laughing and snorting to herself about how a *real* yooper would be wearing a collection of 50-year-old clothing, not a spanking new outfit. Just ask The Commander about that.

Yes, it is Friday. After an early morning skunk walk, a snow-shoveling, vee-hickle uncovering session, a long slog to work with the   TCS   light coming on at every intersection, a long *day* at work, then a walk downtown and back, I am done. Goodnight.

Love you all,
Kayak Woman

3 Responses to “Trade your crocs in for a doctype or two”

  1. Sam Says:

    Heard “Stormy Kromer” mentioned on NPR yesterday—praised, I think…. And, yes, I agree; *real* yoopers don well-worn clothing, especially outdoor gear, in the winter….

  2. Pooh Says:

    However, I doubt the GG would be able to fit in any of his 50-year old clothing — wouldn’t he have been about 6 years old, back then? I do remember going to HL when we were all young and working at Cheap Skate Corp, and the GG’s XC-ing outfit appeared to be about half a dozen or more flannel shirts, layered one on top of the other. Fleece works better.

  3. jane Says:

    indeed – I told Bill his stuff was all too new and not ‘broken in’. except his boots – his boots are authentic.