Coffee at Barry’s with MMCB. The last time I had coffee at Barry’s with MMCB was that April morning I first drove north into the twilight zone. She has been in the midst of a similar-but-different situation to mine except her version of the Twilight Zone happens to be in the beeyootyful Sunshine State. So she is flying a lot. That would be driving me REALLY crazy but it’s pretty much business as usual for MMCB because MMCB is one o’ them thar jet-setters and, yes, you are right, we are still not sure why a jet-setter hanngggggs around with a baggy old kayak woman. Anyway, it has been a looonnnngggg time since I have seen MMCB and the gossip was flowing this morning.

And then, dinner with Mouse and NpJane at the Grizzly Peak. It was nuts downtown tonight. They are shooting some kind of moooovie down at the Old Town Barroooom. If you read this baggy old blahg with anything approaching regularity, you might remember that the OTB is one of our fav-o-rite hangouts. If you do not have NpJane’s parking karma, there is no place to park anywhere downtown, so I had to park way over on Third Street. Which was okay because it was free parking and I got to walk a few blocks. Which I needed. Even though it was raining (ho-hum). NpJane’s parking karma snagged her a spot across from the library.

And, so once again, I need to apologize for letting my emotions spill over onto my blahg. I like to keep those off of it, especially since people like my mother and my kids and many other relatives read it. The last couple of months have been excruciatingly hard and I have been second-guessing the decisions my mother and I have had to make every step of the way. This week has been one of the hardest periods, one in which I have had to back-pedal and re-think some things I really didn’t want to re-think. This baggy old blahg is also a *daily* blahg. On most of those bad days — the ones that we all have — I can hide whatever blackness might be lurking in my soul. I can kvetch about the weather or the traffic or some stupid thing I did. I can even galumph along in my own clumsy way into the political arena. Yesterday I was over the edge and could not climb out. I am sorry.

Was today a better day? Well, tomorrow is always a better day, roight? Not a bad philosophy in my opinion, thank you very much, Scarlett. I still have some excruciatingly hard decisions to make and difficult times ahead. But I am a person who cannot stay too far down for very long. I spent the day swimming back up toward the surface and I saw some interesting, thought-provoking things along the way. And that’s pretty much always how it goes after I take a trip down into the deep, dark depths of Mordor.

Good night,
Kayak Woman

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