In which I am STILL living out of a garbage bag, even though I have been at the Landfill for over a week. Oh, it isn’t really a garbage bag. It’s a ratty old L. L. Bean duffle bag. I have done laundry a bunch of times and I have made half-assed stabs at actually hanging a few articles of clothing up but for the most part I am still pulling stuff out of my duffle bag when I want to get dressed. Or the laundry tub in the Blue and Only Bathroom closet. But I *always* do that. That’s where I stash my walking clothes. And I had no interest in picking out food for tonight. I walked over to the Plum after work, thinking I would pick up some exotic prepared food. But we did that the other night. I was hungry (or knew I would be) but I couldn’t bring myself to make a decision. I bought some orange juice, came home and threw some chicken in the oven. And then there was this awful smell. What was it? Was it the garbage? Nooooo. I finally figured out that it smelled like something burning on a stove burner. And, yes, some loverly burny stuff was about to start a faaarrrr in my oven. My oven is a bit dirty but it hasn’t been THAT long since I last cleaned it. Has it? Anyway, I will have to make an actual LIST of CHORES for this weekend. I can stop living like this some day, right?

I am following a bare bear on Twitter. The Dexter Bare Bear, that is. @DexterMiBear. We have ten thousand gazillion deer here on the Planet Ann Arbor. Just ask MMCB. We have coyotes. We have foxes, raccoons, skunks, ‘possums, rabbits, ground hogs. We have woodland aminals galore. Bares Bears? Not so much. We have Bares Bears up at the moominbeach. They have been known to go after the bird feeders on Barb’s deck and, although I have never seen one there (I don’t think they spend a lot of time on the beach), I have seen plenty of Bare Bear scat in my time. There are Bares Bears in the Northern Lower. They have been spotted near the Houghton Lake Group Home. The Satellite Dexter? Not so much. It is rare that a bare bear would venture to this neck of the woods. I remember going on a girl scout camping trip and we had a kid that had never been out of the “city” or on a boat or whatever and she was TERRIFIED that there would be a BARE BEAR! I had a very hard time keeping myself from laughing. Come to think of it, the Long Suffering Cat Herding Person lives out by the Satellite Dexter. I am trying to imagine an encounter between the LSCHP and a bare bear. Somehow I think the bare bear would run screaming back into the woods. Gentle person that the LSCHP is.

Er, this whole bare bear thing reminds me of a loooonnnnggg time ago when I was a senior in high school and had a college boyfriend and the drinking age was 18 (and I was 18). My boyfriend had this friend everybody called “Chewy” and he got drunk enough one night that he took his clothing off and, after expounding for a bit about being outside in nature, passed out in a snowbank outside his house. I forget whether it was his friends or his wife that finally managed to get him inside. (Yes, he was married. He was 21. My [complicated] thoughts on young marriage another day, please.) What I do remember about this incident is that all of his friends were totally cracking up, calling him “Mr. Bare Nature.” Get it? I know, probably not very funny… Snort.

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