Hey boss, can’t get to work today. I’m stuck in the woods!


The gate is usually open. I close the gate when I am on my Skunk Walk because there are some people who walk a Vicious Dog and sometimes they let it run free in the woods and I do not want to be bitten (this dog has tried). People (including the Vicious Dog Owners) also close the gate when they are in there with dogs, so that the dogs don’t run out and do whatever dogs do when they are untrained and/or untethered. The gate is designed to open *inward*.

This morning it was wide open but someone had managed to open it OUTWARD! I was walking along dum-de-dum and I went into the woods and tried to pull the gate shut behind me… And it got STUCK in the damn fence. I couldn’t get it open again to save my life. All right. What do I do. I can’t call the GG because he is not home. Maybe somebody will walk by (a likely scenario actually). And what will my boss say if I can’t make it to work because of this? Oh, you know that your boss will LAUGH, KW! Kee-reist. And then, I came to my senses and just started kicking the goddamn gate and voila! it opened.

By this afternoon, the gate was fixed and that’s Java in the action shot. She’s not the Vicious Dog, she belongs to my next-door neighbors and even though she was barking up a storm at me and showing her teeth, Java is okay and her owners are responsible. I just happened to be on the other side of the fence from her. I would not have been afraid to go into the woods with Java guarding it but I didn’t because I was just taking a picture.

The rest of the day? Well, except for the fact that some yahoo almost crashed into the Ninja making a turn into my neighborhood and the fact that my email got shut down for a while because some damn hacker was spamming, it was pretty okay. I could not describe the near-accident if I tried, except that I was a sitting duck. I will have to apologize to the young teacher who lives across the street, who was in front of me, for honking. I certainly wasn’t honking at her. Nor was I honking at the man walking on the sidewalk who looked at me like I was nuts.

And then there was the whole email hacker-type thing. Thanks to the Guru for fixing that and holding my hand through some stoopid KW stuff. On his vacation, no less.

2 Responses to “Hey boss, can’t get to work today. I’m stuck in the woods!”

  1. Margaret Says:

    It sounds like a stressful day, although you are making light of it. I would be having a stiff drink. 😉

  2. Sam Says:

    I’m not sure if we HAVE vacations—he delivered files to a client today, for example…. Glad you made it through the wrinkles in your day….