“Do you have your shopping done yet?”, asked the nice *tall* young guy at the store I shouldda been at last week. When somebody asks me something like that, I am tongue-tied. My brain kicks into high gear and fires off in about a billion different directions. I have a full-time job. I go outta town every other weekend or thereabouts. I *hate* shopping when everybody else is shopping (or even when everyone else is *not* shopping) so that cuts out just about every bit of free time that I have, i.e., evenings and weekends. I don’t know what people want although *actually*, people have given me *very* good lists this year, thankye veddy much! I craned my neck up at the tall young guy and mumbled something relatively benign and my errand was successful in the end but, yes, I shouldda been shopping a long time ago. Now I am in panic mode. When will I get it done? Will anything that has to be ordered on line arrive in time? Heck, how many times will I have to go to the blasted grokkery store in the next 10 days or whatever it is? I guess Mouse will be home [again] in a day or so. She can at least help with that. She certainly did over the weekend. And what the heck! She can even buy booze now!

And then there is the stress of “what does Moom want?” The Moom who has everything and then some. Time, maybe? Space, probably? Material goods? Yeeeeeeeeeek! Is it okay if I ask [again] for a new shower head? One that isn’t 40 years old that I can actually adjust [the direction of] *easily* [like I couldn’t this morning — *no*, I couldn’t — and yes, the bathmat got soaked. Again]. I am trying, you guys. I remember being a kid and waiting with great anticipation for presents under the xmas tree. I remember being a rather selfish young woman, hoping again for presents. I remember loading up my little beach urchins with more stuff than they could manage. Now? Stop this holiday! I wanna get off! I just heard the Ninja come in. I’m sure I could dredge up more to say but I’m done for now. You guys. I am trying.

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