Indian toilet paper!

During a small I/M meeting this afternoon, Amazon Woman was kvetching about her trip to Costco which yielded. No. Toilet paper. The third person in our chat was an Indian-American colleague and he piped up gleefully with “Indian toilet paper!” Accompanied by a laughing out loud emoji. AW and I were simultaneously intrigued and sorta like, “Do we want to know?” It turned out he was talking about what we call a bidet. “Yes! $79.95 at the hardware store!” Hmmm, I have enough TP for now and can probably get more but that might be something to consider. I know of some other people who have bidets 🙃

After that we somehow meandered on to the old “If it’s yellow, let it mellow, if it’s brown…” You can fill in the rest. Yes. We used to have to do that at the old Searchmont ski hill in Canananada back in the day. There was no sewer infrastructure in the area and they didn’t have a robust septic system. Many years later, my parents got freaked out about all the flushing going on at the moomincabin when there were 10 people there (which never happened for more than a few days). They tried to institute the yellow/brown policy and we did it for a while until I NIXED it. Nope.

The real problem was that sometimes the moominterlet got plugged up. For my entire childhood and into my young adulthood, I was TERRIFIED of overflowing terlets. Why? Because my PARENTS always got freaked out when there were terlet problems. Then. Dun dun dun. I met the GG. And started going to the Moldy Old Hoton Lake Cabin. I learned how to throw a bucket of water down a terlet to flush it (this was in the winter) and I learned how to use a Plumber’s Helper. So. Up at the moomincabin, when the grandparents were freaking out about terlet trouble, I would swoop in, grab the plunger, and unclog the moominterlet.

I have to qualify that plunging a simple clog is the absolute limit of my terlet repair abilities. I cannot do any kind of snaking and we won’t even talk about ball-cocks. I’m convinced the industry chooses to call them ball-cocks to keep women away from becoming plumbers.

3 Responses to “Indian toilet paper!”

  1. Isa Says:

    Don’t forget to jiggle the handle!

  2. Margaret Says:

    I have two handheld bidets but need to get a plumber in to install them. John would do it, but he’s not around either. 🙁 I hate when a toilet starts to overflow, and one isn’t sure if a vigorous plunging will stop the water cascading all over the floor. Scary!

  3. Jay Says:

    There are many things I did not teach my kids, but I did teach them how to stop the overflow, hopefully before it happened. And for too many in the household, it is always good to have the old outhouse handy.