*Nobody* wants old magazines! I you find somebody who does, I’ll eat my hat!

irisSky & Telescope. Astronomy. NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC!?! Some dating back to 1983. Seems to me that every generation has to re-invent the wheel when it comes to saving old magazines. Oh, but there’s that wonderful article that I didn’t have time to read. Or that quilt that I am definitely gonna make someday. Or this or that gorgeous picture that would be great the next time the kids have one of them thar school prodjects. “Prodjects” was (as always) intentionally misspelled and y’all know the kind. “Moom, my mouse prodject is due tomorrow!!” Yaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh! So we save all of those magazines and they start piling up and piling up and piling up. And piling up. When my beloved late father-in-law moved to Florida back in the 80s, he initially stored his extensive collection of National Geographics in somebody’s garage. He paid $25 a month (I think). This might sound a little crazy and he did have his quirks (who doesn’t, hmmmm?) but I am sure he isn’t the first person to do something like that.

Because we have done our own crazy magazine saving. It was okay at first because there were just two of us plus the teensiest tinesiest little newborn baby in this great big rambling house and there were all kinds of built in shelves in the basement. Except it isn’t a big house at all. It’s a little 1960s-era tract house with the Blue and Only Bathroom on the west side of the Planet Ann Arbor. The teensy tinesy little newborn baby grew into a toddler and started collecting her own toys and books and clothes and things because there was soooo much room here and, even though we were far from rich, we had enough income to spare that we could buy stuff for our baby. And because we loved her so much, we did. And then there was another teensy tinesy little newborn baby and that whole pattern continued. All of a sudden they were teenagers and I started looking around and realizing that I couldn’t actually de-clutter and clean and vacuum the house in an hour or so any more. In fact, I didn’t have any place to put things at all. I was *still* reluctant to get rid of the old magazines. Well what if we need them? What about all those beautiful quilts in my Quilter’s Newsletter Magazine? I guess I thought I would still have time to actually read old magazines. I remember briefly thinking hallucinating about the idea of putting the magazine collection in the shed. Yeah, the crappy old tin shed in the back yard. Kee-reist! Rodent city. I guess the only thing that would’ve been good about that plan is that after they had been out there for a couple of years, it would’ve been easier to shovel up piles of old, tattered, rodent chewed, damp magazines and THROW THEM OUT! But I didn’t do that.

A couple years ago, when I decided I needed to get rid of my quilting magazines, I actually took the time to go out on eBay and see if they were worth something. It’s a long story but I finally decided that messing around trying to sell old magazines on eBay was not worth my time, so into the recycle they went. I’m pretty sure that Craig’s List is about as useless in that case and Freecycle makes you join a Yahoo Group. Which I don’t have time for right now. And I used to *run* various Yahoo Groups. So. This morning, when my opinion was sought about what to do with old magazines, I just shook my head. Or not, actually, I had some choice words. Y’all who know me in real life would know that! The plan is for me to put them in the weekly recycle pickup in small enough packages that the recycle pickup guys don’t break their backs. I can deal with that. Progress!!!

Oh, and if you *do* know of somebody who wants old magazines (Sky & Telescope, Astronomy, and National Geographic) and is willing to to come and PICK THEM UP FROM ME, i.e., I am NOT going to spend time and energy seeking this out and I am NOT going to schlep them, I WILL eat my hat. But not my big sun/kayaking hat. Or my ski band. Or my balaclava.

6 Responses to “*Nobody* wants old magazines! I you find somebody who does, I’ll eat my hat!”

  1. Marquis Says:

    If you would kindly be willing to Fedex them to me here in Saint Louis, I’ll recycle them for you.

  2. grandmothertrucker Says:

    Dad “paid” somebody to store old National Geographics?!

    I have my mom’s quilting magazines. If I had a way to get them, I would love to get yours.

  3. isa Says:

    donate them to the art center downtown, or the recycle center, or haisley’s art classroom, if the want them?

  4. Margaret Says:

    Teachers might want them if they have photos; the kids can use them for projects and stuff.

  5. rabbi ann white Says:

    Glad I was never a magazine collector. I saved one magazine about a home library – saved it for years. And with hopes that soon we will expand (oy! and do the carpentry expansion ourselves, one old babe with a limpy leg and her oldster beloved with a bad back and shoulder – but board by board) okay: expand to build a library studio for me. I rushed to my filing pile (a box of years of paper saving) and resurrected the old magazine and voila! the bookcases I once loved was still there. And I still love them. Only IKEA has cheaper ones.

    ps – I missed your writing. Have been busy this week. You are the first thing I decided to read this awesome sunday morning as I savor my coffee. Have a good week.

  6. gg Says:

    Check out http://hatsofmeat.com – I like the Pork Pie hat – kinda takes the sting out of, “I’ll eat my hat.”.