A “sad” Santa story

See these FOUR little Santas? Now there are two…

These Santas were part of The Commander’s Santa collection. In the pic, they are on the window sill of her assisted living apartment in the Sault Ste. Siberia Freighter View facility (in 2011). She had a small room there but it was in a great location because she could look directly out at the Soo Locks and watch the lake freighters go up and down through the locks.

We had set up some lights and decorations (including these FOUR little Santas) earlier in the month but this was taken on xmas day. It was her last xmas. We spent a wonderful xmas day with her, including a traditional kind of turkey dinner up at her house, The Dillon House. The next day she suffered from yet another bout of “aspiration pneumonia” and landed in the hoosegow again. This was experienced by my then sister-in-law and her daughters, meaning they did not have a very good last xmas with The Comm. For that I am forever sorry but it wasn’t my fault and I have no words except maybe shit happens.

So I adopted The Comm’s Santa collection, which included these FOUR little Santas. A couple years ago, I had this little set of FOUR little Santas out as usual. I don’t know exactly what happened but I *think* The Pensioner put them away. The next year, I could only find two. This is really silly but I was kind of devastated. I didn’t stash the remaining two with the rest of the Santa “collection” that year. I left them out where I could see them so as to not lose any more.

I can’t describe the conversation I had with the GG today but he totally didn’t remember that there were two missing Santas. Or understand how much those Santas mean to me. Or why. Which I haven’t even figgered out. I mean, I get rid of stuff all the time and wouldn’t have a problem getting rid of a lot of the kitschy Santas in the collection (although I haven’t yet). And I also was okay with letting The Commander go. I miss her back in the days when we would gossip like crazy but the last couple years of her life sucked for both of us.

My yearly disclaimer: I do not actively collect Santas. I am de-acquistioning.

2 Responses to “A “sad” Santa story”

  1. Margaret Says:

    Tonya has an impressive Santa collection but she’s not decorating this year. There are often reasons (or not) why we get attached to certain items. Remember the broken Santa that I tried to fix so as not to put it in the garbage? It was special to Patt and the girls, so I don’t want to get rid of it. I’m not a Santa person. If I were a collector (I’m not), I would probably do snowmen/people.

  2. Pam J. Says:

    Oh I get it about the Santas. And I’m sad along with you. There are things in my house that most would consider trash that I won’t give up because they remind me of my dad or my mom or my sister or my kids or an old friend. They will be among the items the trash people haul out of here when Doug and I are dead. I long ago decided that those treasures are my most valuable possessions. Remembering people we love, especially those who are gone, are worth more than a sparkling new anything. I once read a wonderful short piece (in the New Yorker I think) about someone who had a beautiful vase sitting on a table. It fell and broke and he had the expected reaction and mourned for days. But he did self-therapy and decided that physical possessions are more or less meaningless and decided it was OK. I’ve tried, all these years, to make myself be that kind of person and I can’t. So I gave up. Although I did, inspired by you a few days ago, pick up a box of very old family pottery and dishes and assorted breakables from the 1920s and earlier and put it with other boxes of donations to Am-Vets on my front porch. I admit to feeling cleansed when I came home to find it gone. It’s a balance, as so many people say — an irritating but true thought.